Courtesy Photo/Abington Police Department: This is the picture that accompanied the Facebook post from the Abington Police Department that requests singles to turn in their outlaw exes this Valentine's Day.
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ABINGTON – Have an ex you can’t stand with an outstanding warrant, or perhaps an old fling who slings drug as a side hustle?
If so, the Abington Police Department wants to treat them to a “Valentine’s Day surprise.”
In a jocular Facebook post, the small Plymouth County town’s police department said:
“Do you have an ex-valentine that you know has warrants? Or maybe they’re driving around drunk
Abington Police Department’s Facebook Pageor with drugs
on board. This year, we have a very special gift for them!
Just give us a call with their location and we’ll take care of the rest!
This special holiday offer comes with…FREE Transportation
Secure Accommodations
FREE Dinner
A professional set of photos we’ll share all over the internet
And a very special set of bracelets!
Don’t wait! Call today! Our operators are standing by!781-878-3232
Not in Abington? A department near you would be glad to assist!”
Now, this Valentine’s gag is perhaps more cynical than the zoo in San Antonio, Texas, that will name a cockroach after your ex before feeding it to an animal on Valentine’s Day.
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